Hate myself alot?!


Question: Hate myself alot!?
I hate myself!. I'm stupid & ugly!. I can never do anything right!. I let my dad down all the time!. I cut myself and I lie to everyone about it!. I hate how everyone around me is fake!. I think about killing myself all the time!. I can't talk to my mom about cutting!. She thinks "those" people are crazy!. My dad would be so pissed and start yelling at me!. I know he would try to act like he cares about me!. The only thing he does is yell at me for no reason!. I hate my sister she acts like she loves me!. God I just want out right now!. I know this is NOT normal!.The only reason why I have not killed myself is I know that when you hit rock bottom you can only go up!. What should I do!? I CAN'T talk to my parents about this!. My friends would freak out out& not talk to me!. It's summer so I'm out of school!. I'm 17!. What should I do!? My boyfriend's going to leave me if I don't stop cutting!. I'm addicted to cutting!. I have been doing this for 3 years!. My parents don't know about it!. I can't tell them!.Www@Answer-Health@Com


Answers:
You cut because you don't feel like you have any control in your life!. The act of cutting gives you THREE forms of release!. One, you feel better because you are acting out against the people and situations in your life that make you feel inadequate and out of control!. Every cut is like saying, "I can do what I want!" This feels very empowering for the few moments that you are doing it!. Two, you get to feel in control!. Cutters usually have a ritual or a particular way of doing it!. When I was a cutter I would slice thin lines to look like bar codes in my arm!. The longer and more perfect the "bar code" the better I felt about my "accomplishment"!. This is a way to assert control over a situation that makes you feel powerless!. Three, you punish yourself for being so awful!.

The problem here is that it's a false feeling of release!. Almost as soon as you have finished, you start to feel bad again!. This time BECAUSE of the cutting!. You know that you are hurting yourself and that it would upset others!. It makes you feel guilty and like you deserve the poor treatment of others!. And feeling bad makes you want to cut again!. You won't stop cutting just to keep your boyfriend, although you may try to hide it, because deep down you don't think you deserve anyone's love anyway and he was bound to abandon you eventually so you create a "self fulfilling prophecy"!. And when he leaves you for your cutting!.!.!. you will cut yourself to deal with the pain!.

There isn't an easy answer here!. Ideally you would see a therapist and work on the problems that make you want to cut!. From your question I assume this isn't an option!. Short of therapy, the best thing you can do is find ways to assert yourself!. Get involved with something that you are good at where you can take a leadership position!. Get a pet or volunteer to help out at a retirement home!. Apply for a fun internship in a field that you enjoy!. The important thing here is to replace the "bad" action of cutting with a "good" action that also makes you feel powerful and in control!.

I focus on helping other people when I want to cut!. I babysit for friends, volunteer at a local shelter, or answer questions here! It helps keep away the urges to cut because not only am I doing something positive, I am proving all those people wrong who make me feel like I am worthless!. I am proving to myself and others that I am valuable and my thoughts, opinions, and actions DO have an impact on the world!. My actions are actually changing the lives of other people, nothing is a bigger feeling of satisfaction!. Once you get involved with something like this, not only will you feel more in control, but you will also notice that your self esteem improves!. It is hard to hate yourself when you can see how important your guidance and thoughts are to others!.

So, my advice is to find something in your life that you can have control over and excel at!. Once you do you will find the need to cut becomes less and less, and let's be honest, if you have to be addicted to a behavior, being addicted to baking, dog-walking, yearbook committee, or any number of things that make you feel good is always the way to go!.Www@Answer-Health@Com

You need to tell someone!. An aunt or your minister or your old 3rd grade teacher!.!.!.someone!. I did the same for a little while when I was a teen (and felt like a freak)!. I know its somehow easier to face the physical pain of the cuts rather than whatever emotional pain you're going through (people who've never been there don't get it but I do)!. You need help to deal with whats on the inside and getting away from the cutting will come with that!. Find someone, I know you're worth it!.Www@Answer-Health@Com

First of all!. You need the relax and think to yourself, 'why am I hurting myself!? what is it accomplishing!?' then you need to have a good cry and let it all out!. do you ahve a best best best best friend!? a teacher who you trust!? an aunt who will help you!? if not, then i belive it is best if you find a teen hotline!. hope all goes well, and good luck!. :]Www@Answer-Health@Com

Your boy friend is smart by giving you a choice to do whats good for you!. You need to tell your parents!. I know you don't want to!. Is there any other adult you can talk to!? Please get some thearpy!.Www@Answer-Health@Com

do whatever you feel is right!.Www@Answer-Health@Com

Look in the white pages of your telephone book, under 'County of' search for Mental Heath services and call them!. They charge on a sliding scale based on what you can pay!.

Or call National Suicide Hotline 1-800-Suicide (1-800-784-2433) and ask for help!.

Reading material:

Learning to Love Yourself: Finding Your Self-Worth, by Sharon Wegscheider Cruse
How to Raise Your Self-Esteem, Nathaniel Brandon
The Magic of Thinking Big, David J!. Schwartz

While your mom thinks those people are 'crazy' and your dad may yell, I know if I was your parent I would want to help and if I don't know what is going on, I wouldn't be able to help!. You could write a letter to them or tell them in a public place, very calmly and tell them you want help!.Www@Answer-Health@Com

well my sister use to cut herself!.i learned that you get addicted to cuting because when you cut yourself your body produced something that makes you feel goo so you can say its like a drug!.well dont worry my parents are the same why they think that **** was crazy they had to get her phycology help even though it didnt really help but atleast she stoped once in a while she does it when someone gets her really mad!.she stoped cuting because instead she wrote how she felt on the wall with markers!.it did help her!.and please dont end your life unless your thinking of going to hell soul that take away there life go to hell because the only person that can take it away is good!.maybe you dont care about that but just try to talk to someone that will understand you and that is close!.even though im not in your shoes i can feel how you feel!.by what you say your friends are girly girls huh!?!.well im opened minded and i like to help people!.well anyways hope you get better seriously!.Www@Answer-Health@Com

You are self consish , you should go see a social worker and then go to the doctors and talk to them because they wont think you as a freak or whatever they will give you the courage to stand up for yourself,
Also there is no such word as UGLY no-one is ugly there all beautiful in there own way - and if your so ugly how can you get a perfect boyfriend that cares about you obviously your beautiful and a lovely person as well!.
Your sister does care about you i have a sister who loves me dearly and so does your mum and dad , you need to STOP slitting your wrist because this is so bad for you because you can get it into your veins and what would your mum and dad think of you if they saw you do this they would be heartbroken!.
Like i said there is loads of people to go to your doctors or a social worker they will help you and they cant tell you mum and dad anything!.
your mum , dad and sister or love you and will be behind you threw this !!!!!! So talk to somebody !Www@Answer-Health@Com

You need to get help!. Now!. If you feel like you can't talk to your parents, call a suicide prevention hotline!. They can talk to you, they will not judge you, and they can help you figure out what you need to do!. http://www!.suicidepreventionlifeline!.org!.!.!.
Check out this site!. They are a great resource, and they have a hotline you can call (toll free) and have counselors you can talk to!. You can also approach your mom and tell her you are wanting to talk to a psychiatrist!. You can sit in with a psychiatrist and talk without him or her telling your parents anything!. Whatever you say is completely protected by doctor-patient confidentiality!. It sounds like you're very depressed and need some serious help!. Don't be ashamed if you need to go on medication to help with depression!. It really makes a world of difference!. Just about everyone I know has been on some sort of antidepressant, as have I!. They really do help!. Your parents do love you, they aren't just pretending to love you!. They will help you get through this!. It's obvious part of you wants to live because you are asking for help on here!. Call the hotline and reach out for help!. They know how to help, and they truly want to help!. They aren't fake or pretending to care!. Many of them have been through the same thing!. They want to help you!.Www@Answer-Health@Com





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