A counselor who says he loves me?!
Question: A counselor who says he loves me!?
Okay, so Ive known this guy for three years, he's my counselor, and he knows some pretty painful things, that took me alot of guts to talk about with him, and a few days ago, I was in his office, and we were catching up, cause I hadnt seen him in a while, and he was like do you know that I love you!? So ofcourse I blushed and was like no, you do!? And he said ofcourse, but he went on to describe how he didnt love me like a lover, or a sister, or anything!. But that he thinks of me as almost his daughter and thats hes soo proud of me!. So I was really happy he said all that, until I met with my therapist and was telling her all this, and then she was like this is soo innapropriate!. A counselor should never say this and that he crossed over a line and stuff!. Now I dont see whats so bad about that!. I mean if were being honest here I love him to, but in the youve helped me so much way!. If you had to pick who do you agree with!? I just really want to know!. Thanks soo much!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
Answers:
I see nothing wrong with what he said -- but only because he did qualify it as not a romantic love!.
While it wasn't the same thing, my former therapist (a female) gave me a journal (she knows that I journal a lot) and wrote about how proud she is of me and how far I've come!. It made me cry because of how lovely it was and the journal is so special to me I won't use it (one of my quirks - if I really like something, I don't use it!.!.!.usually)!. This therapist helped me through one of the worst manias and worst depressions I've ever experienced and her praise meant as much to me as any I have ever received!.
My best friend's therapist is female and often tells my friend personal stuff - to the point that I find it somewhat unprofessional -- but it works for her and helps my friend feel connected!.
As long as your counselor isn't "in love" with you, loving you as a sister or daughter or, heck, friend, shouldn't be taken poorly!. Especially if it makes you feel good!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
While it wasn't the same thing, my former therapist (a female) gave me a journal (she knows that I journal a lot) and wrote about how proud she is of me and how far I've come!. It made me cry because of how lovely it was and the journal is so special to me I won't use it (one of my quirks - if I really like something, I don't use it!.!.!.usually)!. This therapist helped me through one of the worst manias and worst depressions I've ever experienced and her praise meant as much to me as any I have ever received!.
My best friend's therapist is female and often tells my friend personal stuff - to the point that I find it somewhat unprofessional -- but it works for her and helps my friend feel connected!.
As long as your counselor isn't "in love" with you, loving you as a sister or daughter or, heck, friend, shouldn't be taken poorly!. Especially if it makes you feel good!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
Since he clarified his definition of what "love" means, specifically telling you NOT as a lover or a sister or a date, I don't feel that he crossed over the boundary!. He didn't ask you to have a relationship outside of the office, so he is just a kind person who wanted to let you know that you are a worthy person and that he is proud of your progress!.
Good luck,
TexWww@Answer-Health@Com
Good luck,
TexWww@Answer-Health@Com
No harm!. He qualified it and said that it wasn't romantic love!. I try and tell people that I have love for them all the time!. It's a beautiful thing!. However, sometimes people react poorly!.
Your therapist sounds like one of the great cynics you'll meet in your life!. I suggest finding one who is actually excited about things!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
Your therapist sounds like one of the great cynics you'll meet in your life!. I suggest finding one who is actually excited about things!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
For the most part!.!.I think it is OK!.
He might love many things about you!. He might love your strength, your intelligence, your humor!.
Unless he acts!.!.!.!.in any way that YOU find inappropriate, that would be different!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
He might love many things about you!. He might love your strength, your intelligence, your humor!.
Unless he acts!.!.!.!.in any way that YOU find inappropriate, that would be different!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
He did cross the line in his profession, but if you love someone, even if its just like a daughter,theres nothing you can do about it!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
His comments were at best inappropriate and border on unethical!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
Words are very powerful!. Perhaps he should have used different terms - but he did go on to explain his meaning!. That was important!. No harm - no foul!. kjlWww@Answer-Health@Com
He broke your dream world up now you have to bed him or move on!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
I agree with graydoc on this one!. It was inappropriate!. This is borne out with your post, it's caused you some confusion!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
if you are comfortable with it, then i think its fine!. your therapist wasnt there so she cant understandWww@Answer-Health@Com