Anxiety/ OCD?!
Question: im not sure whether or not i have either of these im a very nervous person and i have a lot of nervous habit like messing with my hair, biting my nails, ripping paper things like that i also get muscle spasms/ a chill? or something down my spine and twitch. i also have to do everything in a certain order or i feel like i cant get it done. im a messy person i guess but im a germa-phobe(my dad calls it) and i always ave been ive also always had to have everything symmetrical and felt like i cant get enough air so i have to breathe like a big yawn a lot. i also dont like it when people touch me and i dont like touching things that im positive are clean (doorknobs, dishware hands etc.) im very impatiant and always have weird feelings i cant explain and feel angry and like i could burst out crying for no reason. i have heart palpitations butterflies i get dizzy i have panic attacks sometimes and i sweat and sometimes my eyes go black. i also have insomnia and fatigue.
Answers: im not sure whether or not i have either of these im a very nervous person and i have a lot of nervous habit like messing with my hair, biting my nails, ripping paper things like that i also get muscle spasms/ a chill? or something down my spine and twitch. i also have to do everything in a certain order or i feel like i cant get it done. im a messy person i guess but im a germa-phobe(my dad calls it) and i always ave been ive also always had to have everything symmetrical and felt like i cant get enough air so i have to breathe like a big yawn a lot. i also dont like it when people touch me and i dont like touching things that im positive are clean (doorknobs, dishware hands etc.) im very impatiant and always have weird feelings i cant explain and feel angry and like i could burst out crying for no reason. i have heart palpitations butterflies i get dizzy i have panic attacks sometimes and i sweat and sometimes my eyes go black. i also have insomnia and fatigue.
You did not mention you age. I think you can convert all your traits into a very successful person. You need to get channelized , get focused and you being over-perfectionist may excel in your studies and later on in job.
I have tackled few cases like you. But you may require elaborate therapy and may be medicines to bring your comfort level to a stage where you can do you day to functions normally. You do not have full blown OCD but what is called as OCD traits or Anankastic Personality which actually many creative and successful people had ! You also seem to be having excessive free floating anxiety which can be controlled by counseling / Medicines.
It sounds like you should find a good counselor that you feel comfortable with that you can talk things through. It will help you alot. Maybe try some yoga and meditation.
I think you have both, and generally they go hand in hand. You need to slow down. Eventually you can teach yourself that patience is a virtue and that not everything is going to bombard you with cooties and swallow you whole. It just takes some work and some time. try to find someone to help. A therapist, someone who may be anxious or ocd themselves, or even just a good friend.
I wish you the best of luck.