Why doesnt sex feel good for me?!
Question: Why doesnt sex feel good for me!?
me and my boyfridn have been dating for 8 months!. He has my v card and I had his!. And i hate how i dont get an orgasim or anything close while having sex!. It just seems sooo good for him, and im gettin nothing!. any help!? :(Www@Answer-Health@Com
Answers:
Is he your first sexual partner!? Have you discussed this with him!? Have you told him what turns you on (do you even know what turns you on!?), or are you just expecting him to somehow or other know!? Are you having sex because YOU are turned on by him and really want it, or are you having it because HE wants it and you think you have to go along (and because all your friends are having it)!?
Depending on how you answer the above, there are a few possibilities here:-
-- You aren't physically attracted to him and you therefore aren't turned on by him and therefore you don't really want to have sex with him!.
-- He's a terrible lover with poor technique and insufficient concern for his partner (you)!. I raise this because of your comment that "it just seems soooo good for him" - this implies that he is perhaps totally focussed on his own enjoyment at the expense of yours!.
This is a no-brainer here!. If you are genuinely attracted to each other and maintain open and clean lines of communication about things (particularly sex), then there's no reason why you shouldn't both experience a mutually fulfilling sexual relationship!.
The fact that you are feeling short-changed here says to me that for some reason or combination of reasons, all is not right with this boyfriend and perhaps you need to be honest with yourself and have a deeper think about that!.
Let's fact it, having sex is a risky business!. Why go through the motions and take the risk if you're not even enjoyng it!?Www@Answer-Health@Com
Depending on how you answer the above, there are a few possibilities here:-
-- You aren't physically attracted to him and you therefore aren't turned on by him and therefore you don't really want to have sex with him!.
-- He's a terrible lover with poor technique and insufficient concern for his partner (you)!. I raise this because of your comment that "it just seems soooo good for him" - this implies that he is perhaps totally focussed on his own enjoyment at the expense of yours!.
This is a no-brainer here!. If you are genuinely attracted to each other and maintain open and clean lines of communication about things (particularly sex), then there's no reason why you shouldn't both experience a mutually fulfilling sexual relationship!.
The fact that you are feeling short-changed here says to me that for some reason or combination of reasons, all is not right with this boyfriend and perhaps you need to be honest with yourself and have a deeper think about that!.
Let's fact it, having sex is a risky business!. Why go through the motions and take the risk if you're not even enjoyng it!?Www@Answer-Health@Com
Breathe; this, thankfully is something that can get better for you with some trial and error and honest communication!.
What I would first suggest for you is to know your own body!. Try some self exploration and figure out what you like!. Get comfortable with it, some girls are helped by reading those steamy romance novels, others are bold enough to try porn, some use touch, toys, or the shower head!. Point is find a starting point and discover your own sexuality!.
Now for you boyfriend!. He should help you as best as he can, but sometimes too much analysis and worry makes it worse!. Take the first part slow!. Remember how much you used to enjoy making out with him!? Take a few steps back and enjoy all the foreplay, or bases 1-3 if you will!. Do the silly kisses all over, do the sensual massages, take a loving shower together!. All these things should help set the tone!.
Now once you are at the stage of intercourse, you need to be able to constructively express you desires!. Don't be negative as that wil put him down!. Tell him how much you enjoy one thing or another!. Guide his body and movements with your own and keep all judgement out of it!. Experiment with this expression of affection, but keep in mind there's no quick fix!. Clitoral stimulation seems to work best for most girls trying to get their first orgasm, so see if oral is an option that he is willing to try!.
There's going to be a lot of ups and downs, but I'm assuming that you are mature enough to handle them if you are having intercourse!. Remember that communication is key! and don't fret about not having your orgasm yet!. That is normal for many girls starting out!.
I'd recommned that he read "She Comes First" and that you read "Passionista" both by Ian Kerner!.
Good luck!Www@Answer-Health@Com
What I would first suggest for you is to know your own body!. Try some self exploration and figure out what you like!. Get comfortable with it, some girls are helped by reading those steamy romance novels, others are bold enough to try porn, some use touch, toys, or the shower head!. Point is find a starting point and discover your own sexuality!.
Now for you boyfriend!. He should help you as best as he can, but sometimes too much analysis and worry makes it worse!. Take the first part slow!. Remember how much you used to enjoy making out with him!? Take a few steps back and enjoy all the foreplay, or bases 1-3 if you will!. Do the silly kisses all over, do the sensual massages, take a loving shower together!. All these things should help set the tone!.
Now once you are at the stage of intercourse, you need to be able to constructively express you desires!. Don't be negative as that wil put him down!. Tell him how much you enjoy one thing or another!. Guide his body and movements with your own and keep all judgement out of it!. Experiment with this expression of affection, but keep in mind there's no quick fix!. Clitoral stimulation seems to work best for most girls trying to get their first orgasm, so see if oral is an option that he is willing to try!.
There's going to be a lot of ups and downs, but I'm assuming that you are mature enough to handle them if you are having intercourse!. Remember that communication is key! and don't fret about not having your orgasm yet!. That is normal for many girls starting out!.
I'd recommned that he read "She Comes First" and that you read "Passionista" both by Ian Kerner!.
Good luck!Www@Answer-Health@Com
He gets his and you don't get yours!. That is not fair at all!. Tell him if he cannot get you to orgasm then you won't have sex with him!. Try foreplay!. Does he go to sleep after you have sex!? If so toss a bucket of icewater on him to wake his butt up! Making love should be enjoyable for both people, not just the dude!. Make him get you off BEFORE you get him off!. It's your body you make the rules!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
Watch porn!. If you think it is gross, then you can't have an orgasm because your not comfortable with what your doing and it is a mental block on your part!. Also watch it to make sure his technique is correct!. See Yahoo answers on video streaming porn to find a virus free sites!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
WOOOOW!! that sux!.!.!. wait, if ur doin it in ur but then ofcorse it isnt feeling good!. but if ur willing to not use a condom then it might feel betterWww@Answer-Health@Com