Herpes ruining sex life?!
Question: Herpes ruining sex life!?
I've been with my boyfriend for 3 years but I recently got diagnosed with genital herpes!. He however does not have it (I have been faithful to him, so I must have gotten it from an ex)!. He was supportive at first but my first outbreak was so bad and then I had what I thought were one or two recurrences in month (It's possible it may have been razor burn) and he got scared and we haven't had sex in 3 or 4 weeks (the longest ever)!. He doesn't like talking about it because he said he isn't good talking about his feelings and he doesnt want to make me upset and that's why he prolonged telling me he was negative! Should I just wait for him to get comfortable!? I have printed out info that I want to give him this weekend!.!.!.I'm just going crazy and I'm worriedWww@Answer-Health@Com
Answers:
Please go check out www!.herpes-coldsores!.com!. There is an online support forum with a whole bunch of people who are in exactly the same circumstance as you!. I think you will find that they are a more experienced bunch than the Y!A folks!. They have been a lifesaver for me!. Much better than a bunch of people who don't have it saying "oooh, gross!."
Also, I'm not sure if you can have had it for many years, but then have your initial OB!. The first one is definately the worst, but I wonder if it can be latent in your system and then come out!. He definately tested negative through blood tests!? I don't really know!. And I don't know what to say about the whole sex thing with him except that it is very hard, and that most likely you were having tearing/irritation during sex (which is not an OB or razor burn)!. Your skin changes consistency and is much more delicate!. Seriously, go check the website!. I'm on it, and many other likeminded folks can give you tips! Good luck!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
Also, I'm not sure if you can have had it for many years, but then have your initial OB!. The first one is definately the worst, but I wonder if it can be latent in your system and then come out!. He definately tested negative through blood tests!? I don't really know!. And I don't know what to say about the whole sex thing with him except that it is very hard, and that most likely you were having tearing/irritation during sex (which is not an OB or razor burn)!. Your skin changes consistency and is much more delicate!. Seriously, go check the website!. I'm on it, and many other likeminded folks can give you tips! Good luck!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
This is really sad!.
All he needs to do is use a condom when you are having an outbreak, that's all!.
If I were you, I would ask him to accompany you to see a sympathetic and understanding doctor so that you can both bring questions up in front of one another!.
The doctor will put his mind at ease!.
It's not as if you have AIDS after all!.!.!.!.!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
All he needs to do is use a condom when you are having an outbreak, that's all!.
If I were you, I would ask him to accompany you to see a sympathetic and understanding doctor so that you can both bring questions up in front of one another!.
The doctor will put his mind at ease!.
It's not as if you have AIDS after all!.!.!.!.!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
OH KELLY - NO! Don't have sex AT ALL during outbreaks!
Condoms help between outbreaks - they help keep that 2% chance down a bit - but they only protect against your INNER vaginal walls & your outbreak wasn't likely there!?
but where are your outbreaks!? they're usually in the same spot or close to it - so keep a close eye on that area!.!.!. look for tingling, itching and outbreaks (I shave bald & that helps me check the area easier)
and do not have sex - at all - when you feel any symptoms or PRE-symptoms (the tingling or itching)
Being paranoid of shaving bumps is ok - I still do that from time to time - we call it a "false alarm"
Educate him a little on how you're going to protect him - ask him if he has any questions!.!.!.and leave it at that!.!.!. TOO MUCH INFO when he doesn't want to talk about it could scare him off!.
relax a bit and realize your triggers (what causes the outbreaks)
Most likely triggers are sun exposure (tanning beds too), stress and clothing that irritate the area (I can't wear silk panties anymore)
***EDIT*** the only way sex with him could CAUSE (trigger)an outbreak is if he gave it to you & you were having sex while he had an outbreakWww@Answer-Health@Com
Condoms help between outbreaks - they help keep that 2% chance down a bit - but they only protect against your INNER vaginal walls & your outbreak wasn't likely there!?
but where are your outbreaks!? they're usually in the same spot or close to it - so keep a close eye on that area!.!.!. look for tingling, itching and outbreaks (I shave bald & that helps me check the area easier)
and do not have sex - at all - when you feel any symptoms or PRE-symptoms (the tingling or itching)
Being paranoid of shaving bumps is ok - I still do that from time to time - we call it a "false alarm"
Educate him a little on how you're going to protect him - ask him if he has any questions!.!.!.and leave it at that!.!.!. TOO MUCH INFO when he doesn't want to talk about it could scare him off!.
relax a bit and realize your triggers (what causes the outbreaks)
Most likely triggers are sun exposure (tanning beds too), stress and clothing that irritate the area (I can't wear silk panties anymore)
***EDIT*** the only way sex with him could CAUSE (trigger)an outbreak is if he gave it to you & you were having sex while he had an outbreakWww@Answer-Health@Com
Just talk to him and educate yourself as well as him!. His chances are slim because female to male transmission is generally lower than male to female!. And if you're on Valtrex that should help both of you tremendously!.
You have to understand his fear, especially after seeing you first hand with an outbreak!. As long as you use protection, take your meds, and don't have sex when you think you're getting an outbreak!. Most people generally get whats called a prodome, which is like itching and burning or tingling in the area where the sore/lesion is going to appear before it comes!.
If the info that you gave him didn't convince him, take him to the ob/gyn with you and have the Dr explain the whole process with both of you!. Good Luck!!
http://www!.cdc!.gov/STD/herpes/STDFact-He!.!.!.
http://www!.valtrex!.com/Www@Answer-Health@Com
You have to understand his fear, especially after seeing you first hand with an outbreak!. As long as you use protection, take your meds, and don't have sex when you think you're getting an outbreak!. Most people generally get whats called a prodome, which is like itching and burning or tingling in the area where the sore/lesion is going to appear before it comes!.
If the info that you gave him didn't convince him, take him to the ob/gyn with you and have the Dr explain the whole process with both of you!. Good Luck!!
http://www!.cdc!.gov/STD/herpes/STDFact-He!.!.!.
http://www!.valtrex!.com/Www@Answer-Health@Com
U SHOULD OF USE PROTECTIONWww@Answer-Health@Com
You can go to the std site dating & social site called pozcupid !.com and find people living with the same std!.Www@Answer-Health@Com