I think I have body dismorphic disorder?!

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I think you have an Obsession rather than a condition. I knew someone that was anorexic, and she refused to discuss it and hid away all of the time. So the fact you are posting your clothes size on a public forum suggest to me that your just a bit obsessed with you size. And you know you not fat because you have stated that you seem to be podgy EVEN though you know you fit into very small clothes.
xx

Is there a family member obsessed with weight and appearances? It sounds like you're getting a bad message about your worth from someone. Your worth has nothing to do with being fat or skinny; it has to do with other factors. Indeed, there's a really big range of sizes that people can get away with. If you have a great sense of humor or are really smart that's going to attract a lot of people. If you have a great sense of style that will attract other people. If you're fat, skinny, or imbetween, each of those will attract different people. If you're blonde, you'll attract some people; if you're brunette, you'll attract other people. If you are businesswoman, you'll attract one type, if you're teacher, you'll attract another type. In other words, you're focusing way too much energy on your weight, when it's not what's most important about you. While you're worrying about your weight, are you taking care of your other qualities--your style, your humor, your intelligence, etc.? If you start doing that, you'll rely on your impeccable logic and eat a little more, not less, so that you're healthy and fit enough to work on your other qualities.

View: http://www.betterhealth.vic.gov.au/bhcv2… Only use a small hand mirror to check appearance, so just a small part of the body may be seen at a time, yet anything wrong will still be immediately apparent; cover (taping over/painting) full length mirrors. Check out www.bddcentral/mainpage2.aspx and http://www.ocdla.com/bodydysmorphicdisor… and www.mental-health-abc.com and www.psychforums.com/viewforum.php and http://p066.ezboard.com/bbodydysmorphicd… and http://www.bbc.co.uk/health/conditions/b… and http://bddvictims.lefora.com/headlines/ and http://www.femalefirst.co.uk/search/?cx=… Practice a relaxation method, daily, and when needed, such as www.drcoxconsulting.com/managing-stress.… or http://altmedicine.about.com/cs/mindbody… and/or Tai Chi, Qi Gong, or yoga. Other things worth trying: Enter "EFT" in the searchbar, at www.mercola.com (free), & "EFT therapists (professional is recommended) a good tryout, to see if it helps you. There is a version for use in public places, (you could claim to have a headache, as you use the acupressure massage/tapping on your temples, but you would then be restricted to subvocalising: repeating to yourself in your mind): "Even though I have a distorted body image, I deeply and completely accept myself". All of these things are designed to bolster the central sense of identity, enable emotional centering, and changing the focus from that of a person's appearance. When you notice something negative, such as: "Why can't I be beautiful, like those in movies, and magazines?", or a disturbing image, recognise that this is generated by the negative part of your mind.

After identifying it, visualise a large red "STOP!" sign, and/or possibly a stern faced person wagging an index finger at you in a negative manner, then say to yourself as forcefully as you can, even aloud in a big voice, if alone: "I know this tactic: GO AWAY FOR A WHILE !!!" You may want to use either: "ruse", "ploy", "game", or "trick", instead of "tactic". In the case of an image, visualise a large "STOP" sign, or your preferred version. Some people go so far as to keep a wide rubber band in their pocket, then put it around their wrist, when they catch themselves backsliding, stretch and release it, as a method of reprogramming their mind sooner, but I don't regard it as being strictly necessary. Remember to remove it, afterwards, if you use this method. It may well be worthwhile going to the Groups, at Myspace, Google, and Yahoo, and discuss it with them. Read "Picture perfect : what you need to feel better about your body" Jill S. Zimmerman Rutledge. by Health Communications, c2007, & The BDD Workbook: Overcome Body Dysmorphic Disorder and End Body Image Obsessions - Paperback 2002 by James Claiborn and Cherry Pedrick, & The Broken Mirror: Understanding and Treating Body Dysmorphic Disorder - Paperback 2005 by Katharine A. Phillips M.D., & The Body Image Workbook: An Eight-Step Program for Learning to Like Your Looks by Thomas F. Cash from your bookstore, or Amazon.com Try the support groups, chat sites, and forums: www.bddcentral.com & http://www.thebddfoundation.org/self_hel… & http://www.experienceproject.com/groups/…

Also see: http://hubpages.com/hub/Improve_Your_Bod… & http://www.wikihow.com/come-to-terms-wit… "Come-to-Terms-with-Feeling-Ug... ~~~ Come to Terms-with-Feeling Ugly & http://www.wikihow.com/Feel-Pretty They shorten weblinks, so I provided the full text for you. Also enter "feeling ugly" in the searchbar at http://www.wikihow.com for more, including a video for females. Most people are suggestible, to some degree, so you could seek professional hypnotherapy, or other alternatives along those lines, may be found at http://your-mental-health.weebly.com/g.h… on BDD.